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I'd like
to share a few of my favorite letters and emails with you. All
are printed here with the kind permission of the writers. Please
send email
and letters - I would love to hear from you!
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January 2, 2008
Dear Mary,
My name is Caroline Aguiar. My husband and I own a guest ranch
in Baja, Mexico. Horses have been a part of my life since I
was a small child. Your book, She
Flies Without Wings, put me in touch with that little
girl (me) who was drawn to the horse at a very early age and
who has loved them ever since. Whenever I have come to a cross
roads in my life involving a difficult situation or change,
the horse always relieved any sadness, anxiety or worries that
might have overwhelmed me. For years I have tried to reason
with myself and analytically figure out this strong connection
I feel towards horses and after reading your book, it dawned
on me that the "why" is not really important. It is what it
is, and I am so grateful and blessed to have horses in my life.
Mary, without taking up too much of your time. I just wanted
to add something that has engraved on me an even deeper belief
in the magic and healing powers of horses.
This past October, my horse of 6 years became seriously ill
and we had to put him down. I was crushed. About the same time
I found out my father was terminally ill with cancer and he
didn't have much longer to live. It was a very trying time.
I'm so busy, I don't really get any alone time. So when I'm
at the ranch and out riding, I love to disappear into the hills,
just myself, my horse and my dog. It's truly relaxing for me.
It rejuvinates my very being and I'm able to carry on with the
hustle and bustle of every day life. Well, here I was, my horse
gone and my father was so sick. I felt lost. We were still finishing
out the season with our groups who visited our ranch and I began
riding another horse who my husband had recently bought. He
was planning on adding him to the string for our guests. My
husband loaned him to me until we could find another horse for
me. His name is "Cuate" and in spanish that means
friend.
I began riding him and he was certainly a nice well dispositioned
horse and a working ranch horse. But I kept having all sorts
of feelings such as insecurity, I kept thinking I was going
to fall or the horse wasn't right and it was so out of character
for me. I used to ride barrels and ride over trails most people
would hesitate to ride through. I've been riding all my life
and here I was doubting every inch of the trail, the horse and
most of all doubting myself. I think Cuate could feel my fear.
I tried so hard to conceal it but with horses, they know.
I spent a good deal of time handling him on the ground, or
just watching him while he grazed in the pasture. We got to
know each other and at the same time I came to terms with what
was going on with my father, who passed away this past December.
Cuate is very different from my other horse. His temperament
is more calm and peaceful. I think that is what I needed in
my life. In fact after my other horse died, I had been hoping
for a horse like Cuate to come along. My hopes were answered
but my fears were blinding me from seeing it.
Spending time with Cuate, either riding or just hanging out
in the corral has soothed my grief over my father and although
I don't know why, after my father passed, those fears I had
and doubts just vanished. I've never felt safer on Cuate and
I feel like we're an excellent match. Just the other day I was
rubbing his head and I stopped for a moment when he nudged my
hand and looked me right in the eye to keep going. It was a
glint of understanding or communication however trivial it may
seem, its a beginning. To me, being in the presence of the horse
and being able to work with them as closely as I do and finding
such a nice horse as Cuate, is a real gift.
Thank you for writing such a wonderful book!
Sincerely, Caroline Aguiar, Baja Rancho La Bellota, www.bajarancho.com
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May
12, 2007 - I want to express my gratitude to Mary Midkiff
for what she did for me and my mare Jane recently at Equine
Affaire in Columbus, OH. I was singing from Jane’s back in the
evening program called Pfizer Fantasia and a couple of hours
before our Saturday performance, Jane was signed up to be a
demo horse in Mary’s “How to Calm the Nervous Horse” presentation.
Jane had done beautifully the first couple of performances,
but she had definitely been nervous since it was her first time
in front of about 5,000 people. So, the demo couldn’t have been
more custom-made for us. Mary used acupressure and massage along
with her essential oils called The
InBalance Horse, (which I personally recommend keeping on-hand
at all times), and within about 20 minutes or so, Jane was calm
and connected with me - it was INCREDIBLE! Her head was
down, she was hipshot, not nervous at all, it was like she was
“home” and ok with it all. That night, when the crowd applauded,
she acted like it was old hat, I was so honored that she was
so “with me” and I’ll be forever thankful to Mary, she truly
is AMAZING and a real gift to the horse world… Thanks Mary!!
Templeton Thompson & Jane
TempletonThompson.com
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August 3,
2006
Dear
Mary,
My name
is RJ and I am 23 years old, and horses have played a major
role in my life since birth. They are the inspiration for my
art and my writing, but, most importantly, they are the greatest
source of peace and stillness that I just can't achieve anywhere
else. I come from a very diverse background (being half Cherokee
Indian-half Irish), and though I look more Cherokee than Irish,
the one thing that I have inherited from both sides of my family
is the "horse craziness". The Irish side of my family were mostly
Gypsies and farmers that relied heavily on the workability of
their horses, while the Cherokee side focused on the spiritual
bond created between rider and horse. I get my passion for horses
deeply and honestly, and it has grown as I have grown over the
years.
I came
across your book She
Flies Without Wings while browsing through the equine
section in Borders, and it was like this book had been written
with me in mind. Every word that you have written echoes the
thoughts, feelings, and emotions that I have when it comes to
the relationship that I have with horses. I absolutely couldn't
believe it...So I read it a second time. Reading your book has
given me a goal that I have been wanting to reach for a very
long time, but never had a name for it until now. I want to
thank you for inspiring me to seek out my Horsemaster's certification,
which will only open the pathway to my ultimate dream: my own
mustang rescue.
The first
horse that I ever rode was a mustang mare named Blaze, a silver
grulla with bright, jagged blaze that colored her face from
forelock to chin. She had been rescued from the slaughter house
by her owner Nancy back in 1989, and even though she had been
battered and scarred from her life out in the Badlands of South
Dakota and from the crude capture methods that snared her and
most of her herd, I thought she was the most beautiful creature
that ever walked the earth. In the years that I rode at Nancy's
farm, Blaze was mine to ride, feed, groom, and love on, and
in return she opened up my entire world by introducing me to
hers.
Blaze died
in the spring of 2000 at the age of eighteen when she came down
with a severe case of laminitis. Nancy couldn't bear the thought
of her horse suffering, so she had her humanely put down...Of
course, I was there, and I still mourn her death. Out of all
the horses that I have ever ridden, Blaze touched me in a way
that I never thought possible. She's the main reason that I
wanted to start a mustang rescue in the first place, especially
after Nancy told me the story of the horrors that Blaze had
gone through, and the years of therapy that she had endured
to achieve healing and trust of humans.
Out of
all the books that I have read about the bond between horses
and their riders, your book speaks volumes louder than the rest
could hope to achieve. Thank you...Thank you for putting into
words what it is to be a horsewoman, especially for those who
just don't understand (the majority of "those" being men). I
hope that you continue writing more books such as She
Flies Without Wings and Fitness, Performance
and the Female Equestrian because I absolutely can't
wait to read more. Thank you so much again...And give my regards
to Theo.
Gratefully
yours, RJ
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May 18,
2006
Dear Mary,
I really enjoyed the newsletter article you sent. I agree whole
heartedly that riders need to stretch and keep their riding
muscles in shape from the ground. I teach Yoga for Riders and
like to think of it as ground work for people.
We know
how important ground work is to our horses, and it is just as
equally important for riders. All riders who take my Yoga for
Riders classes receive a Yoga diary in their information packets
and recommend they keep a Yoga journal. I ask them write down
each day that they spend some time doing Yoga before going out
to the barn to ride. And how their ride goes, and comparing
it to the days they don't make time to do their Yoga Poses and
stretches before they ride.
I receive
many e-mails from them saying that they really can tell the
difference when they take some time to do a bit of Yoga either
at the barn in the tack room before they ride or at home before
they leave for the barn.
I have
been practicing Yoga for 20 years now. I started doing Yoga
20 years ago when I became a jockey. I needed a workout that
would work my muscles and my mind with out adding big bulky
muscles. Yoga was it... Now that I have been teaching Yoga for
Riders Classes I'm amazed that more riders don't warm up before
they ride. Then they wonder why they can't get certain movements,
even the simple ones to be performed smoothly. Usually because
they aren't asking properly. Their low backs and hip flexors
are stiff and they aren't able to follow the motion of the horse
thus they are interfering. Which of course leads to frustration
both to the horse and to the rider.
Thank you
so much for promoting the importance of doing any type of stretches
before you ride to keep riding muscles in shape. Not to mention
it helps with body control as well.
Sincerely,
Cynthia Medina
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Dear Mary
My name
is Helen Shellhammer. I live in beautiful Northern California
and in the last six months have purchased a 9 year old thoroughbred
that I had been admiring from afar for over 4 years. I haven't
ridden in over 20 years but have felt a calling as I approach
my 40's to my old childhood world of the barn, horse smell and
long trail rides. I feel I have forgotten more than I ever knew
about horses and riding which has driven an insatiable desire
for books, clinics, training and knowledge. I have never been
more that a backyard rider with some small little shows and
play days tucked in here and there but have always had an ability
with horses to say "reach them" or probably more accurately
"be reached".
I have
read at least 10 books in the past three months searching for
vocabulary that matches my desire, my interest, my passion and
my life with my new horse. I have just finished (devoured) your
book, She Flies Without Wings and at last feel I have validation
in this life I am sharing with horses and am compelled to thank
you from the bottom of my heart for putting into words what
I am experiencing. I have had such a huge range of emotion experiencing
danger, tenderness, wildness, athleticism and a beautiful connection
with my horse that I now cannot imagine my life without. Thank
you for discussing issues like menopause, career changes, marriage,
family and injuries in your equestrian experience.
Your story
is a treasure and has offered amazing perspective to my journey.
Thank you for sharing it.
Helen Shellhammer,
Woodland, California
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